Alexander Averin

Sunday, 1 July 2007

Rainy Days and Sundays

Love is an act of endless forgiveness. A tender look which becomes a habit.

Peter Ustinov.

Dear Diary,

A dark morning, a rainy Sunday. Last night was a Full Moon. We’ll have three dark days now before the New. I went to sleep listening to the rushing river and the torrential rain, it was magic. The sound of running water raises your vibrations. If you ever have trouble sleeping I can recommend ‘Tranquillity’ teabags by Dr. Someone I forget his name and am too lazy to go look. I bought them in Holland and Barretts in Brecon and they are very relaxing, they really makes you feel sleepy in fact.
Again I find it hard to ‘come to’ and it’s only my large mug of honeyed tea brought to me by M that forces me to sit up.

I've been trying to post pictures in amongst the text as I go along but to no avail so I have bunged them all above. I will have to seek instruction from Higher Computer Beings on how to do it.

A trio of doves are outside my window; one on the top of the telegraph pole, the usual roosting place of one of the owls and the other two are just behind on the branch of a pine tree. Mother, father and baby; they did have offspring after all as I had hoped they would. Only one has been seen, do they usually have larger broods I wonder?

I wish I had my camera and tripod set up by the window. I had it there for ages and nothing presented itself and the minute I take it away…..

There is a baby magpie around a lot too and lots of sparrows. The latter remind me of my childhood as they were one of the few birds I saw, growing up as I did in South London.

We had quite a lot of heavy rain last night but the river has still not reached the top of the bank - M can’t understand it - I think we are very lucky.

My son S is away this weekend and lucky fella he will be working backstage at the Diana concert. He is a self-employed builder but does security work at the weekends; he gets to concerts, festivals, sporting events, all sorts. He was going to a ’Guinness’ wedding in Oxfordshire but it was changed. He is a musician himself and I am very envious that he is at Wembley today. He has just phoned me to tell me he is there and that William and Harry put on a children’s party yesterday in their mother’s memory, that has brought a tear to my eye.

I hope the concert is a success; I can’t believe it is nearly ten years since Diana died. I will always remember that Sunday morning when I heard the news - M told me and strangely enough I just ‘knew’ straightaway that it was no accident. I am not a monarchist, I merely felt for Diana and saw her as one of life’s victims who was treated badly by the very people who should have given her the best care. She was a woman who touched a lot of hearts and did a lot of good in her life, probably because she had that certain quality that was needed. Empathy. We were just going off on a holiday to Ireland the day she died and the whole week we were over there we saw that so many of the population were just as ‘affected’ as Britain was, it wasn’t a ‘royal’ thing. Everywhere we went the people were mourning her loss.


M’s chest is still rattling, it’s a good job we didn’t go away this weekend and the weather, well you all know about the weather… It’s a shame I booked leave from work and I haven’t even been able to get out in the garden. Still it gives me a chance to rest and read and catch up with my writing.

I’ve started doing daily crosswords again (warding off Alzheimer’s don’t you know!). M has been doing them for years and is very good, he always helps me out when I am stuck.

Nearly forgot my blessings.

Antibiotics. Life savers that we sometimes take for granted.

Telephones - instant contact with loved ones lifts one’s spirits.

Emergency Services. Firemen and women - they put their lives on the line for us and attend all manner of accidents and emergencies as do the ambulance personnel (why are those people that do so much good paid so little?). . Nurses as well of course…..

My nurse training which has been a blessing since the day I qualified even though I don’t work as a nurse. The life skills I learned can be applied to the whole of my life now.
Not least the quality of

Patience. Thank God I was granted that (in some areas if not all!).

Imagination. Albert Einstein said it was more important than knowledge. I am inclined to agree, are you?

Well I will sign off now, go cook some egg and bacon. Play some music. Music is the best thing for ‘down days’ and this afternoon I will watch the concert and listen to some more.

Depression is blocked energy and as well as music, can be cured by exercise, humour moves it too.

Q. Why was the mushroom invited to the party?
A. Because he was a fungi.


Before I go, a couple of poems written by my daughter

Summer’s Reverie

And so we danced
A moonlit sphere
Illuminating grass and daisies
Feet wet with evenings
Dewy caress
Witnessed by hares
Black-eared, watchful

Caught up, Captured
Sweet summers scent
Intoxicating magic
Carried upon hilltop breeze

Slow swaying silhouette
Moving to sounds of
Dulcet birdsong
Singing our praises,

Verity Ellen Jones

Upon her passing

Kicking his toes
Steel encased, heavy
He contemplates dawn
Face weather beaten
Bitter morning floods his lungs

Too cold for planting,
Soil sweet and thick.
Hungry cattle wait
Wet noses steaming through
Gates laced, prickled, white

Head down-turned
His feet tread well known
Steps across frosted lea
And down dirt track
Boots sticking to cloying loam

On, down to the brook
Resting his frame on
Time smoothed stone
Instinct drives feet into water

Clods of earth lift
Out of deep soles
Remove themselves from his grief

Tears bring heat
Sweet release
Dropping into the rush of white.

Verity Ellen Jones

And I thought I’d share with you the email that M sent to his daughter V about one of the poems.

I thought it was a poem in itself.

I read your poem and thought it lovely. Why am I always
near to tears these days? Is the world really such a sad place? I look out of the window when my flying finger pauses and see the quaking aspens shaking their leaves like giggling girls at the fair, in their first pretty dress. The older Alders look at them in stoic understanding and sympathy and the river continues to flow as it always has and always will. The rain has started again but will stop sometime. So, love you and look forward to seeing you all again soon. Now, do I send this or not? Oh! blow it you'll understand. XXX

Remember a hug a day keeps depression away.
At eight o’clock tonight I will, as usual, along with others, be sending purple hugs to all those in need and lighting a candle for them. (Blue candles are the best for absent healing).

Bye for now,

PS The sun has come out


LittleBrownDog said...

That was a lovely, thoughtful blog, and I loved your daughter's poems as well as M's email - they're obviously as in-tune with nature as you are. Thank you for sharing them.

The Country Craft Angel said...

It was a lovely blog as always and made me think.

I loved Princess Diana-I must have just been at the age and the romantic in me saw her as the true Fairytale Princess. Except she did have a very tortured and tragic life whatever people think of her...

I absolutely love the poem and E-mail.

warm wishes

sally's chateau said...

Am rather sad that I can't get to watch the concert tonight. x


Beautiful, Nothing else to say just beautiful. Thank you.

snailbeachshepherdess said...

Princess Diana..a tortured soul...I hope she is at peace.

Lovely blog, lovely poems and thoughts...take care

snailbeachshepherdess said...

Princess Diana..a tortured soul...I hope she is at peace.

Lovely blog, lovely poems and thoughts...take care

Woozle1967 said...

Lovely as ever - blog, poems and blessings.

I remember spending all of the Sunday morning it was announced Diana had died, glued to the TV and in my dressing gown - amazed, unbelieving, sad...... We had been at a wedding at exactly the moment the crash happened and returned home laughing after such a wonderful occasion. Our friends' anniversary is always tinged with sadness.xx

Anonymous said...

I really enjoyed reading your blog, it was very touching. The poems are lovely, a joy to read. I've just been thinking how this evening feels typical of a Sunday. The air is still once more and there's a flicker of a beautiful sunset.
Crystal xx

bodran... said...

A lovely blog, i remember the day diana died so clearly as everyone does..... i wish i could have been at the concert tonight!
I havent read running for the hills, i'll look out for it..xx

Elizabethd said...

A lovely piece to read.
I've just been watching the concert...could have done without some of the 'oldies', think Tom Jones is past it now!
But the interspersed shots of the effect Diana had on other peoples lives were so moving.

Pondside said...

Mmmmmm - so nice to read your blog. I hope you M recovers soon - yes, thank goodness for antibiotics.
The poems were lovely, the second one so sad.
Great that you have found a cousin on the internet. I've had the same experience, except I was the one 'found' - wonderful thing to have happen!

CAMILLA said...

Gosh Cait, your blog is truly wonderful, you capture everything so wonderful. Beautiful words of lush prose, and the poems of yours and your daughter's are just heavenly. I too was fond of Princess Diana, she sadly was misunderstood by some, but her heart was made of gold. I believe if she were alive today and things had been different, she could have become Queen. I too have been a nurse for many years, although I have reduced my hours, and now am working in the community. I remember the day Diana died, I had just finshed working my fourth night duty, and was woken in the morning by my husband with a cup of tea, when he told me the sad news, I could not stop crying. By the sheer volume of the crowd at her funeral will tell us that she was adored by many. I thought 'M' email to Verity was lovely.

Suffolkmum said...

Oh that email was beatiful. What a lovely relationship they must have. I love Verity's poems too, what a lyrical family you are. Like everone, the day Diana died is etched on my memory. I remember the terrible sadness I had for her boys. My poor friend was giving birth when the news came through - none of the midwives paid her much attention after that!

Pipany said...

Verity - such a beautiful name. The poems were wonderful, Cait, as was the whole blog. I do agree with you about the hugs; they can only ever help can't they? Thank you for your lovely comments on my blog. I have had a truly soothing catch up on yours. They always make me feel at peace - a true gift of your writing xxx

Blossomcottage said...

As UPL said "Beauitful"